BEFORE: I know, I watched the remake before the original - it's happened before, it'll probably happen again, as I can't always control when each movie comes into my life and makes it to The List. Like me, Turner Classic Movies apparently has a fascination with heist films (or "caper films", as they call them), and they ran a whole bunch in January this year, just before the Oscar-themed programming. It was an embarrassment of riches, and I had to choose a select few, I didn't have room for them all - not if I wanted to keep making progress against the tide.
Linking from "Quick Change", Randy Quaid was also in a 1999 film called "The Debtors" with Michael Caine (last heard in "Gnomeo and Juliet").
THE PLOT: Comic caper movie about a plan to steal a gold shipment from the streets of Turin by creating a traffic jam.
FOLLOW-UP TO: "The Italian Job" (2003) (Movie #1,136)
AFTER: This one's rather short and to the point - they managed to save time by cutting out the "planning" phase of the heist. The plan comes from the lead character's mentor, who was killed before he could pull of the job, but prior to that spent months blocking out the perfect heist. A few minutes are also saved at the end by not providing a proper resolution.
The debate rages - should criminals be depicted on film as successful, enjoying the ill-gotten fruits of their labors, or should their schemes come to an end, meeting with failure either comic or tragic. Does crime pay? Should it? Unfortunately, you won't find an answer to that question in this movie, because they chose to end the film at a rather precarious juncture. It almost seems like they just ran out of film stock - but more likely it's another prime example of a screenwriter reaching a crossroads, and not knowing which way to go.
So what we have here is about 98% of a film. A promising set-up, a really brilliant heist, and then zero follow-through. When the credits start to roll, you might think "Really? But HOW does it end?" Well, technically it doesn't. You can always choose whatever ending you prefer, but from a writing standpoint, to not have one is a real copout.
Before that, however, we're treated to a beautiful car chase, with the BMC Mini Coopers, precursor to the BMW Minis that were seen in the remake. While the entire town of Turin is stuck in the world's largest traffic jam (I'd like to see the stats on that...) the pre-minis can go drive up and down stairs, through pedestrian walkways, over buildings, etc. However:
NITPICK POINT #1: Can a mini jump from building to building? Probably. Can a mini jump from building to building when loaded down with gold bars? That seems a lot less likely. (See, Brett Ratner? Gold is HEAVY.)
NITPICK POINT #2: Could you really start a traffic jam in 1969 by switching out a reel of computer tape in a control center? Again, I'd like to see the proof.
Plus, if you've got to go to prison, try to make sure that it happens in the U.K. Prison life over there looks really sweet, with all the comforts of home. If you're a crimelord, that is.
Also starring Noel Coward, Benny Hill.
RATING: 4 out of 10 jumpsuits
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