Changeling

Year 3, 70 - 3/11/11 - Movie #800

BEFORE: Looking for a real benchmark film for big movie #800 - something like this with a big-name star and a big-name director (Clint Eastwood) will hopefully fit the bill. Linking from last night, John Goodman was in "The Big Lebowski" with Steve Buscemi, who was in "Con Air" with John Malkovich, who's in this one - I wish I'd known that before, I would have scheduled this closer to "Color Me Kubrick" and "The Great Buck Howard".

THE PLOT: A grief-stricken mother takes on the LAPD to her own detriment when it stubbornly tries to pass off an obvious impostor as her missing child, while also refusing to give up hope that she will find him one day.

AFTER: Wow, Angelina can ACT, and I don't say that often. I was glad to find out that she was Oscar-nominated for this, I think she really deserved it. She's given a lot to work with, a very troubing situation after her character's son disappears, and the police experts return a child who fits her son's description, but who she comes to believe is not him.

It's complicated, because children at that age grow rapidly, so at first it seems possible that his look might have just changed in his absence - but it also seems that the police might have been more interested in closing the case, as opposed to SOLVING the case. The film is set in 1928, before DNA testing, facial recognition software, voice-printing or most other modern identification techniques. Also, this was before missing children became a national concern, so most mothers at that time wouldn't think to have their children fingerprinted, or perhaps even warn them about "stranger danger".

There's a lot of meat to this plot, as it turns into a showdown between a mother and the entire LAPD, touching on gender issues, police corruption, and mental health issues, as well as the missing children epidemic. Without giving too much away, this could have easily fit into my law/trial chain, of course I wouldn't have known that without watching it.

My reward to myself for hitting movie #800? A few hours of "Grand Theft Auto", which I haven't played in months. Cheers!

Starring Angelina Jolie (last seen in "Mr & Mrs. Smith"), Michael Kelly, Amy Ryan (last seen in "Dan in Real Life"), Jeffrey Donovan (from the TV show "Burn Notice", but really channeling Guy Pearce in "L.A. Confidential" here), Colm Feore, and Peter Gerety (last seen in "Miracle on 34th St.)

RATING: 7 out of 10 Model T's.

King Ralph

Year 3, Day 69 - 3/10/11 - Movie #799

BEFORE: Riffing off of last night's plot, with a commoner somehow failing upwards, and becoming the leader of a country. Linking from last night, Dana Delaney was in "Exit to Eden" with Dan Aykroyd, who was in "Blues Brothers 2000" with John Goodman. Easy-peasy.

THE PLOT: As the only relative to take over the Royal throne, a down on his luck American slob must learn the ways of the English.

AFTER: As always, I must consider whether the comedic premise is plausible. A freak accident wiping out the entire royal family? Possible, I guess. The stewards of the monarchy seeking out the lineage of a child born out of wedlock, and giving the throne to a common American? I doubt it. As the movie itself states, another option would be to have the throne resort to someone from the House of Stuarts, instead of Windsor. Sorry, WindHAM, according to this film.

Another timely choice tonight, with all the press about the upcoming Royal Wedding, plus the recent Oscar victories - with Goodman's character learning all about his royal duties and proper etiquette, is this film kind of like a low-rent version of "The King's Speech"? And doesn't Colin Firth look a little like a less pudgy John Goodman? (Damn, this would have been a good opportunity to go to the cinema and see "The King's Speech" afterwards, but I didn't think of it.)

Anyway, the film - not believable, but it's amusing enough, once you get past the America-bashing. Of course they make Ralph an obnoxious Vegas performer to heighten the "fish out of water" effect, but he's also an honest, good-natured guy who's trying to do his best, even though he's not cut out for the job. No real laugh-out-loud moments, but to its credit it becomes rather heartwarming at the end.

And like in "Moon Over Parador", someone understands the concept of a story-arc. In both cases the commoners come to power, and then start developing their exit strategy. It sounds really simple, but the easiest screenwriting mistake to make is to accidentally tell only half of a story. A rookie writer might figure out a way to get a crass American to become king of England, and end it there, leaving the audience feeling unfulfilled.

This week has turned out rather silly, but it's time to get serious - tomorrow night is big movie #800, after all.

Also starring Peter O'Toole (last seen in "Stardust"), John Hurt (last seen in "New York, I Love You"), Richard Griffiths (last seen in "Bedtime Stories"), with cameos from Joely Richardson, Julian Glover (Gen. Veers from "The Empire Strikes Back", last seen in "The Fourth Protocol").

RATING: 6 out of 10 pinball machines

Moon Over Parador

Year 3, Day 68 - 3/9/11 - Movie #798

BEFORE: Well, my cold fought back today, so I've moved on to the DayQuil, Hall's cough drops and chewable vitamin C tablets. Let's give a birthday SHOUT-out to the late Raul Julia (last seen in "Presumed Innocent"), born March 9, 1940. I guess I'm allowing posthumous birthdays, since I celebrated both Elvis Presley's and James Dean's. Linking from last night's film, Gene Wilder was in "The World's Greatest Lover" with Danny Devito, and he was in "Tin Men" with Richard Dreyfuss (last seen in "Nuts").

THE PLOT: A little-known actor is working on location in the country of Parador at the time the dictator dies. The dictator's right hand man makes him an offer he cannot refuse.. to play the dictator.

AFTER: This was unintentional good timing - the film opens in a fictional Latin American country at the time of Carnivale - also known as Mardi Gras in some countries, which happened to be yesterday. The word carnival, of course, is closely related to the Spanish word for meat - "carne" - since for some it's the last chance to eat meat before Lent. Hence "Mardi Gras", or "Fat Tuesday", same thing.

Essentially, this is a riff on "The Prince and the Pauper", a Mark Twain story that assumes the possibility that two people from different social backgrounds can look almost exactly alike, and switch places. Here it's a New York actor who (with the help of make-up and a wig) can do a fair impression of a Latin-American dictator - which actually turns into a fairly original twist to the "doppelganger" scenario. (see also: "Dave", and Chaplin's "The Great Dictator")

And we learn all about the strange habits of the now-deceased dictator, as the actor steps into the role - his mannerisms, his favorite beverage, his favorite mistress, etc. For the actor, it's the chance of a lifetime, to inhabit a role so completely that he fools an entire country, even the world, even people who knew the dictator personally.

But then the film takes another twist - once he succeeds in the role, how can he possibly get out of it? Leaving would throw the country into chaos, but he's anxious to get back to his acting career. To its credit, the film solves the dilemma in a rather neat way.

I knew something was up with the dictator's mother, but I couldn't quite figure it out - turns out she was played by the film's director, Paul Mazursky.

Also starring Sonia Braga (last seen in "The Rookie"), Fernando Rey (last seen in "French Connection II") with cameos from Jonathan Winters (last seen in "The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle"), Sammy Davis Jr., Charo (those last three seem right out of an episode of "Love Boat"...), Dana Delany, Polly Holliday (last seen in "Mrs. Doubtfire"), Ed Asner, Dick Cavett and Dann Florek.

RATING: 6 out of 10 sides of beef

Another You

Year 3, Day 67 - 3/8/11 - Movie #797

BEFORE: Looks like I've got a new sponsor here at the Movie Year - Cold-Eeze. That's with three "E's" but not in a row. I feel like it turned my potential three-day cold into a one-day cold - 2 Dayquil and some sushi with extra wasabi today, and I feel clear. Not that I'm being compensated in any way, but I'm happy to sing the product's praises.

Gene Wilder carries over from last night's film, and this is his only pairing with Richard Pryor I haven't seen - "Stir Crazy", "Silver Streak", and "See No Evil, Hear No Evil" being the others.

THE PLOT: George has been in a mental hospital for 3 years and is finally ready to go out into the real world again...Eddie Dash, a con-man, is supposed to keep him out of trouble, but when people begin to recognize George as a missing millionaire, Eddie wants to take advantage of the situation.

AFTER: Well, it fits with my theme, since Wilder's character is a compulsive liar, and gets mistaken for a millionaire that he apparently resembles. But what are the chances of that? There's an overly complicated scam going on, but by the time its nature was revealed, I was past the point of caring about it.

Pryor and Wilder were best when their characters worked together, toward some kind of common goal, but here they seem to be at odds with each other just as often. And it's all over the inheritance of a brewery? Why would I watch this confusing mess when I can re-watch "Strange Brew"? Well, I guess I have to watch this to get it off my list, but you don't have to play along at home - please, save yourselves.

Also, lip-synching is bad. Yodeling is bad. Lip-synch yodeling is downright deplorable.

Like too many films here in Year 3, I wish there were more of a point to this movie, but it's just so aimless and misguided.

Also starring Mercedes Ruehl (last seen in "Crazy People"), Stephen Lang (last seen in "The Men Who Stare at Goats"), Vanessa Williams, with cameos from Kevin Pollak (last seen in "That Thing You Do!"), Michael J. Pollard, Vincent Schiavelli (last seen in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest"), and Andy Summers (from the band The Police).

RATING: 2 out of 10 beer steins

The World's Greatest Lover

Year 3, Day 66 - 3/7/11 - Movie #796

BEFORE: I finally caught my wife's cold, but it hasn't hit me too badly yet - I might be able to combat it with a combination of Cold-Eeze, some spicy Indian food, and a couple of strong beers. If it reaches Phase 2, that's when I pull out the Sudafed, DayQuil and Mountain Dew. Otherwise, I feel energized since my team won bi-weekly trivia tonight, I took the final round by answering questions about Spider-Man - take that!

This film slipped under the radar, I left it out of my chain about actors and entertainers (twice!) so I'll include it here in the "mistaken identity" chain. Linking from last night's film - Steve Zahn was in "Sahara" with Matthew McConaughey, who was in "A Time to Kill" with Patrick McGoohan, who was in "Silver Streak" with Gene Wilder.

THE PLOT: A neurotic baker travels to Hollywood to attend a talent search for an actor to rival the great Valentino. Although not an actor, through blind luck he succeeds - to a certain degree!

AFTER: This was a mostly-silly homage to the classic silent film era - and the success of Rudolph Valentino, famous for the film "The Shiek". It seems like women in the 1920's had these grand romantic fantasies about Arab men who would whisk them away to their desert palaces, and presumably add them to their harems. Nowadays, not so much.

For those of you too young to know who Rudolph Valentino was, he's mentioned in the 80's song "Manic Monday", performed by The Bangles, and written by Prince. (Yes, Prince wrote a song whose lyrics mention dreaming about kissing a male Hollywood icon - androgyny was very "in" back in the 80's) For those of you too young to know who The Bangles were, please don't talk to me, you'll make me feel old.

Gene Wilder plays a normal guy, Rudy Hickman, who heads to Hollywood with his wife in tow, to be part of an enormous talent search by a small studio to find an actor to compete with Valentino. Hickman even goes by the name "Rudy Valentine" to heighten his chances. But there are only a few minor problems - like his lack of acting ability, his clumsiness, and his habit of sticking his tongue out when he's nervous.

Gene Wilder has one volume here - loud. Comedically, he's best when he occasionally freaks out ("The Producers", "Young Frankenstein"), but here he's freaking out all the time - not so funny. And isn't the film-within-a-film supposed to be a SILENT movie? There are a few visual jokes that land, but even more that go nowhere - mostly it's cheap slapstick.

And his wife sort of runs hot and cold - she claims to love him, but drops him for Valentino in a heartbeat. They reconcile with the help of Valentino himself, and then just after professing her love, she leaves AGAIN. Can't this woman make up her mind? Why waste time reconciling with a woman who's so flighty?

Also starring Carol Kane (last seen in "Four Christmases"), Dom Deluise, and a ton of 1970's character actors - Fritz Feld, Carl Ballantine, Jack Riley (last seen in "Chairman of the Board"), and Elya Baskin (last seen in "Being There"), and a brief cameo from Danny DeVito (last seen in "The War of the Roses").

RATING: 3 out of 10 burqas

The Great Buck Howard

Year 3, Day 65 - 3/6/11 - Movie #795

BEFORE: Ooh, getting close to movie #800, which I should hit on Friday. What will it be, I wonder? I assure you, there is a method to my madness, or perhaps it's the other way around. John Malkovich carries over from last night's film - his birthday is in December, when I'll be on break, so I'm watching his films now. Here he plays a mentalist, which is kind of like a con man, right?

THE PLOT: A young man, much to the chagrin of his father, becomes the new assistant to an illusionist in decline.

AFTER: Well, I really identified with this one. I work for an animator of some notability, and for two weeks out of each year (San Diego + New York Comic-Cons), I do function as his road manager. He's not as tempermental as Buck, but the job comes with similar difficulties - if something goes wrong, I could easily be held responsible.

This story is obviously (and admittedly) based on the work of The Amazing Kreskin - famous for his "effects" (not tricks) and supposed mental powers, which are probably a combination of sleight-of-hand, the power of observation, and plain old common sense. (The director of this film used to be Kreskin's road manager.)

To its credit, the movie never reveals how Buck Howard (or Kreskin) performs his tricks - but it does eliminate earpieces and audience plants, so it does help narrow the field of possibilities. There's a strong suggestion about how Howard does his most famous trick, but you have to pay careful attention to see it.

But mainly, this is a story about Howard's road manager, a young man who's not sure what to do with his life after dropping out of law school, and he figures that working for a mentalist will at least give him important experience, if not a solid career. I thought along those same lines 17 years ago - and I'm still at the same job, so for me it did become what I was meant to be doing.

I've always said that every creative person - filmmakers, rock stars, actors, etc. - needs someone working for them, doing the day-to-day stuff. Booking flights, collecting checks, filling out paperwork, so that the creative person has more time to be creative. I stand by that, and I've built my career on it. But the true employer-employee relationship is symbiotic, as seen here - there must be things that the employee can do that the employer can't do, or doesn't understand. Only then does job security exist.

Same problem as last night's film, though - I'm not seeing how all the events of the film add up to some greater point.

Also starring Colin Hanks (last seen in "The House Bunny"), Emily Blunt (last seen in "Dan in Real Life"), Ricky Jay (last seen in "The Prestige"), Steve Zahn (last seen in "Rescue Dawn"), with cameos from Tom Hanks (last seen in "Road to Perdition"), Griffin Dunne (last seen in "An American Werewolf in London"), Adam Scott (last seen in "Step Brothers"), Wallace Langham, Gary Coleman, Conan O'Brien, Jon Stewart, Tom Arnold, Regis Philbin, Kelly Ripa, Martha Stewart and George Takei.

RATING: 5 out of 10 autographed photos