The Scorpion King

Day 290 - 10/17/09 - Movie #290

BEFORE: OK, enough Frankenstein, bring on the next monster, mummies. But what's the connection? Well, "Van Helsing" was directed by Stephen Sommers, who re-vitalized Universal's Mummy franchise a few years back, and I've already seen the first 2 films in that series. Sommers didn't direct this one, but he wrote and produced it. Vince McMahon is also listed as a producer, hmmm...

THE PLOT: A desert warrior rises up against the evil army that is destroying his homeland. He captures the enemy's key sorcerer, takes her deep into the desert and prepares for a final showdown.

AFTER: Clearly written to take advantage of The Rock's talents, which include hand-to-hand combat, camel riding and ironic eyebrow-arching. Michele saw a bit of the film and said that the camel was a better actor...

The movie explains how Mathayus, one of the last Akkadians, takes down evil King Memnon, who rose to power by following the advice of a sorceress (Kelly Hu). It takes place in ancient Egypt, predating even the pyramids - yet somehow they have gunpowder, which wasn't invented in China until 200 B.C. I recall "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" using the same cheat, but at least in that film it was chronologically possible.

Anachronisms aside, this was an acceptable action flick, lots of swordplay and narrow escapes (one of which was stolen from "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom", namely cutting down a giant gong and running behind it as it rolls.) I think Mathayus was able to succeed because the ancient Egyptians had no defense against head-butts during swordfights, or against the People's Elbow, for that matter.

But I thought this movie was meant to explain the background of the giant Scorpion creature with The Rock's head, seen in "The Mummy Returns". How did Mathyus, King of ancient Egypt, get turned into a giant man-scorpion thingy? I guess they explained it in the other film, but I sort of forgot...

Also starring Michael Clarke Duncan, and Roger Rees (who I didn't even recognize) as a deposed lesser king.

RATING: 6 out of 10 cobras

SPOOK-O-METER: 1 out of 10 (lots of action, but no demons or mummies)