BEFORE: OK, this is my movie for Thursday, October 6, and I did watch it starting on the night of the 5th. But then I got busy on Thursday, so I'm not posting my review until Saturday, however this is STILL officially the Thursday movie. What happened? New York Comic-Con, that's what. I trained my co-worker in the ways of the Booth Jedi - my last Padawan quit on me in February, and I had such high hopes for her. But this was his first time, and I didn't want his first time to be a bummer, like a 12-hour bummer, plus we only have one badge to share, and I didn't want to come into Manhattan JUST to get the badge from him, that would be stupid. So I suggested that he come in at 8:30 to get to the convention at 9:00 am, and I'd take over for him at 3 pm, he'd step out of the Con, hand me the badge, and I'd finish out the day. THUS, I would already HAVE the badge on Thursday so I could get in on Friday morning. This meant I could also count the cash on Thursday night, put the booth materials away the way I like to do it, and also take all the valuable art home with me on Thursday, so, like the badge, I'd have it for Friday. And elegant solution, but one that necessitated me working 2 1/2 days at the con instead of the planned 2. It's all good, except for the parts of working long hours at a comic-con table that drive me bonkers. More on that in a bit.
Julianne Moore carries over from "Tales from the Darkside: The Movie".
FOLLOW-UP TO: "The Rage: Carrie 2" (Movie #3,957)
THE PLOT: A shy girl, outcasted by her peers and sheltered by her religious mother, unleashes telekinetic terror on her small town after being pushed too far at her senior prom.
AFTER: The question to ask here, really, was, did we NEED a remake of "Carrie"? Well, no. And also, yes. Really, the 1976 version directed by Brian de Palma should have been sufficient, it's a classic film, total iconic horror film, and in many ways it said all that needed to be said, and contained everything it needed to contain, and jee-SUS, who can complain about Sissy Spacek as Carrie, in her prom dress, covered in pig's blood? Totally classic. And for one young boy who caught that film late night on Boston's UHF Channel 38 that aired it, for some unknown reason, completely uncensored, it was very, umm, enlightening, shall we say. At a time in my life when I really REALLY wanted to know what goes on in the girls locker room, and let's just say I got more than I bargained for. (There seems to have been a bit of a competition, back in the 1980s, between Boston's channel 38, WSBK, which aired "Carrie" uncensored, and Channel 56, WLVI, which ran "My Tutor" uncensored. Yes, I was watching and taping them both, and I was perhaps forever warped by them. Come to think of it, both channels were trying to compete with HBO and Cinemax, and were resorting to desperate measures.)
But times change, some time after I moved out of the suburban Boston area, WLVI became an outpost of the CW, and WSBK got bought up by CBS News, I guess they're both somewhere on the cable dial still, but I have no idea where, I haven't had any reason to look for them when visiting my parents' house. Dana Hersey of WSBK's "Movie Loft", which aired the 1976 film "Carrie" on that controversial night in the 80's, is now in the Massachusetts Broadcasters Hall of Fame, and I guess that means that the nudity scandal blew over, or was never a big deal in the first place. Perhaps I shouldn't have brought it up again - Mr. Hersey is apparently still alive (?) but he's probably well past retirement age by now, and I'd hate to see his golden years tainted by scandal.
But 37 years later, somebody re-made "Carrie", and yeah, I think it was probably time. The 1976 film used mostly practical special effects, and filmmaking technology has come a LONG way since then. The remake could do all kinds of new things, and portray Carrie's telekinesis in much more powerful ways. You need 30 knives to rise up simultaneously and all plunge themselves into the same person? Not a problem. You need a split to appear in the middle of a city street and chase down a speeding car, gradually turning into a giant chasm that will swallow up that car? We can do that now. I know, I know, just because you CAN do all these things it doesn't mean that you SHOULD, but the story calls for all of this, and it's damn cool what can be done know with the special effects.
I also have to deal with the changes at New York Comic-Con - we moved our animation studio's table from the main show floor, where we had a primo booth for about 10 years, to Artist Alley, which is smaller, more intimate, and that change (which we made three years ago) had its ups and downs. When we had the booth on the main floor, we could sell all the DVDs and books we wanted, plus posters, shirts, we had a porn star signing one year at the booth, it was crazy fun. BUT we also had to lug in our own tables and chairs, PLUS our boxes of merch, PLUS rent some A/V equipment if we wanted to show animation in the booth - it was a lot of work. Moving to Artist Alley meant we had to sell mostly art (plus maybe a few DVDs) but in general, life became much simpler. A table and two chairs is now provided for us, we don't bring in as much merchandise, just a few art portfolios, and the cost of the space rental is much less, which means that last year was our best ever, profit-wise, at NYCC.
The 2021 convention was an anomaly, perhaps, because there was still limited attendance due to still following pandemic rules, and there were fewer booths rented out as well. The main show floor had space to spare - built-in social distancing - and they were so desperate to fill the spaces that a Mendy's kosher restaurant (made famous on an episode of "Seinfeld") even opened up, not in the food court, but in the MAIN SHOW FLOOR. It couldn't even serve food on Saturday, because of Kosher rules, so I don't know how it made any money, but it was kind of neat that it was there. Now, today, I went back up on the main show floor and I didn't even recognize the place. So many booths selling Funkos, trading Funkos, grading Funkos - what's with all the Funkos? And there were NFTs, holograms, and tons of "mystery boxes" - who the hell drops $75 on something without knowing what they're buying? It's crazy. I used to eat Chinese food from the cafeteria on the lower level there, maybe some popcorn, and now IN THE BOOTHS they're serving Ramen soups, okonomiyaki (Japanese veggie pancakes) and octopus balls. WHAT THE HELL? I even passed one booth in the middle of everything, serving FUDGE. Everybody in the world knows that comic books and fudge are natural enemies, and now this? OK, so the fudge was colored like superhero costumes, so I guess it fits in, but it was $13 for two slices, basically half a pound, so that's way too expensive.
It's not the NY Comic Con that I remember, that's for sure. But that's the main show floor, I work in Artist Alley now - my point, however, is that change is inevitable and may not be to everyone's liking, but nonetheless, things change. I was moaning a few weeks ago that I wasn't able to work in any "back-to-school" movies in September, but look, here's "Carrie" set in a high school in Anytown, USA - but probably Maine, because it's based on a Stephen King book. And from what I can tell, they didn't base the 2013 film on the 1976 film, but they went back to the source material, written by Stephen King in 1974, but set in the then-future year of 1979. Some critics called the 2013 remake "unnecessary", but if you go back to the 1976 version after watching this one, you may disagree. Progress is progress, and any great story that's nearly 40 years old could probably use a refresh.
Some modern updates here, after Carrie gets her first period during gym class, and freaks out in the shower, here the girls don't just taunt her by throwing tampons at her, they also take a cell phone video of her, which is wrong on many levels - it's an invasion of her privacy, a form of bullying, and I think it's illegal to post a video online of someone showering without their consent. Anyway, point in favor of the remake here.
However, we have to also TAKE AWAY a point because if this film is set in a more modern time, then surely Carrie White would have been forced to take health class in high school, mandatory sex education and all that, so NITPICK POINT, she maybe shouldn't have been so clueless about her menstruation, she would have been told in this modern era that a girl getting her period is a natural part of life and growing up. UNLESS Carrie's mother is so religious and hung-up then maybe she wouldn't allow Carrie to take sex-ed class, that's certainly possible. But if that's the case, maybe a line of dialogue that could have explained that would have gone a long way here.
They hired the director of "Boys Don't Cry" for this remake, and I suppose that's fine. But the theme of high-school bullying is a tough one, especially when it applies to girls, who we all now know are much crueler to each other than boys are. Boys will punch each other, kick each other, bloody a few noses - but girls hurt each other emotionally, that does a lot more damage in the long run. And Carrie gets bullied at school by other girls, then comes home and her religious mother accuses her of all sorts of things, and makes her pray in a locked closet. Then it's back to school - poor Carrie just can't win. And then when Tommy Ross asks her to prom, she can't believe it's for real (it's not) and she knows that if she says "Yes" it's only going to freak her mother out even more. Sue Snell, Tommy's girlfriend, convinces Tommy to take Carrie to prom because she feels bad about the shower-room bullying - Sue's probably the only character in the film who's likable, maybe also the gym teacher.
I don't think there are any issues with the chronology of "Carrie 2", which is a sequel that came out a few years before this remake. There's a reference here when Carrie is arguing with her mother, suggesting that maybe her mother is upset because the telekinetic powers skipped a generation, or maybe came from Carrie's father's side. It appears the latter is true, if Carrie's half-sister (same father, different mother) has the powers too, then they must come from her father's genetics.
And DAMN IT, why does "Hubie Halloween" have a better angle on fighting back against bullying than "Carrie" does? Hubie's mom showed us that all of the people who bullied him needed to be exposed, forced to reveal that they were all either victims of bullying themselves or they were secretly envious of Hubie and how decent of a human being he was. They hated themselves and took it out on him. Why can't "Carrie" search for meaning in a similar method? Carrie's solution is to kill all her bullies, but the problem with that is they haven't learned anything, because they're super dead. And she's just kicking the problem can down the road a bit. Look, if you're being bullied than wrecking prom and blowing up the school should be VERY far down on your list of potential ways to solve the problem, that's all. It does more harm than good in the end, but people have their emotional limits, I get that.
NITPICK POINT 2: What's that sport the girls are playing in gym class? It's not water polo, it's more like volleyball being played in the pool? Is that even a thing? Huh, pool volleyball is apparently an activity that exists... who knew?
Also starring Chloe Grace Moretz (last seen in "Tom & Jerry"), Judy Greer (last seen in "Driven"), Gabriella Wilde (last seen in "Wonder Woman 1984"), Portia Doubleday (last seen in "Fantasy Island"), Zoë Belkin, Samantha Weinstein (last seen in "The Rocker"), Karissa Strain, Katie Strain, Ansel Elgort (last seen in "West Side Story"), Demetrius Joyette (last seen in "Owning Mahowny"), Barry Shabaka Henley (last seen in "How Stella Got Her Groove Back"), Arlene Mazerolle, Evan Gilchrist, Eddie Max Huband, Alex Russell (last seen in "The Host"), Connor Price (last seen in "Good Luck Chuck"), Jefferson Brown (last seen in "Red"), Cynthia Preston, Philip Nozuka, Kyle Mac (last seen in "Miss Sloane"), Max Topplin, Mouna Traoré, Derek McGrath (last seen in "Charlie Bartlett"), Chris Britton (last seen in "The Shack"), Hart Bochner (last seen in "Rules Don't Apply"), Annie Chen, Natalie Dale, William MacDonald (last seen in "The Captive"), Michelle Nolden (last seen in "RED"), Irene Poole, Kim Roberts (last seen in "Steal This Movie"), Vanessa Smythe.
RATING: 5 out of 10 Bible passages
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