BEFORE: Benny Safdie carries over from "Licorice Pizza". Probably the toughest part of putting the February chain together is knowing when to STOP linking, where do I draw that line? If I didn't make some cuts, then the romance chain might extend into June - and I'd miss a few holidays like Easter and Mother's Day. Plus, I have to think about leaving enough material to work with for next year, assuming there is a next year. For example, there's a film called "Love Is Strange" with John Lithgow and Alfred Molina as a gay couple, and it's also got Harriet Sansom Harris in it, so I had that next to "Licorice Pizza" for a long while. BUT, it was running on cable and I missed it, so I take that as a sign that maybe it wasn't meant to be part of the chain, at least not this year. It also links to another romance film, "Untamed Heart", so both of those films stay on the list, and this fall I'll check to see if they can be part of the chain next time around.
There's another film called "Boys and Girls" with Freddie Prinze Jr. in it, that I missed out on last year. It became available on cable after I'd already watched "She's All That", "Head Over Heels" and "Down to You". So now it's on the list, and I have to look for another way to link to it - Jason Biggs is also in it, so I decided to cut "Loser" from this year's romance chain to increase the chances of linking to it next year. Thankfully I found that after cutting "Loser" and one other film, there were two films that could slip right into their places, making links through other connections. That's also something I take as a sign, if I notice that a replacement like that can be made, it means that I should probably do it.
Then there's this new film, "Shotgun Wedding", with Jennifer Lopez and Josh Duhamel. I'm already planning to use Josh Duhamel as a link, so this new film could slip right in-between those two films with him in it, so that's a sign, right? If I see a film can be added to the chain, I should probably do it, right? Not so fast - here I also have to think about next year, who else is in this movie and what else does it link to? Well, it links to "Marry Me" which also has Jennifer Lopez in it, and "Austenland", which also has Jennifer Coolidge in it - so that could really help me out in 2024, it would turn a 4-film block into a 6-film block, and then maybe I can link up that 6-film block with a few other blocks and put a whole month together, you just never know.
THE PLOT: Follows a variety of New York characters as they navigate personal relationships and unexpected problems over the course of one day.
AFTER: Well, I was talking about "Magnolia" yesterday with regards to Paul Thomas Anderson, and then this film comes along from Magnolia Pictures. Coincidence? How about the fact that both this film and that film are set in a 24-hour period, and detail a bunch of relationship problems and unexpected events taking place? How about the fact that Philip Baker Hall appears in both movies? See, there's no such thing as coincidence, there's just this stuff that happens. The difference is, however, that "Magnolia" is often regarded as a masterpiece of filmmaking, and this one, not so much.
If anything, this feels like a student film, or a film made by somebody just out of film school, who knew one semi-famous actor from class and met a more famous actor at a party, and then used those connections to get two or three more veteran actors involved. The rest of the cast is made up of actors I'd never heard of before, so either they're the director's friends or there was some kind of "act in this film for free and get your SAG card" scam going on, like in "Narrowsburg".
They apparently only had access to two locations, a watch repair shop and a thrift store, and then sort of built the whole story around that. For the rest of the shots, the plan was to just film on the street and use Central Park, and let me know if you see the cops coming, we can hide the camera if needed because we don't have permits. I mean, come on, that newspaper office set looks completely bogus, it looks like those government offices in "Eraser" where some set designer thought that all they needed was a computer, desk and two filing cabinets, and the audience would buy it. Right, because every major newspaper editorial office in NYC is a third floor walk-up.
I think this was supposed to be one of those films where we all learn that we're all interconnected, because each day we interact with so many people and we usually fail to realize how our actions affect others, but really, we're all part of one big social network thing. Bleargh. What is this, "Crash"? More like "Thud". There's the fleetingest bit about romance here, as a girl who's clearly into girls starts to maybe think she likes boys, too, after being forced to interact with a guy named River (again, Bleargh) while her best friend makes out with her boyfriend. Oh, if only she didn't have to choose between girls and boys! Quel problemme! Come on, you just know she wants to get it on with her best friend, but she just doesn't have the nerve. Why don't all four of you drink that beer or smoke that weed and then whatever happens, happens.
In other news, a woman applies for a job at a newspaper and the editor takes her on a stakeout, trying to figure out if a woman killed her husband, and they think the answer can be found in a watch shop. This part of the film feels a bit like a madcap Woody Allen film like "Scoop" or "Cassandra's Dream", only without any of the charm. OK, maybe the newspaper editor likes this girl and is trying to get some action, but since he's played by Michael Cera, he's a nebbish who can't quite get it together. And by the end of this storyline, I promise you that you really won't care whether the woman killed her husband or not.
There's also a record collector who gets a hot tip about somebody selling a rare Charlie Parker album, who obsesses over whether the shirt he's chosen for the day suits him, or perhaps it's too fancy for him. He's got a friend crashing on his couch, he's hiding out because he put some nude pics of his ex-girlfriend on the internet, and now her brother is out to hurt him. That's it, that's the movie, three or four intersecting storylines, all of which get put on hold when there's a stabbing near Central Park, and I guess that's supposed to put everything in perspective or something.
The "Love Tip" for the day, I guess, is "Never post nude photos of your ex online", which is a lot more helpful than the Love Tip from January, which I think was "Never have sex with a horse." Good advice, all around. Other than that, there's just not a lot here, so my romance chain is starting out a bit slow, but hopefully I'm building up to something better. I'm hard-pressed to figure out the "why" of this film, and the "how" - like HOW did this get on to HBO Max? It's a mystery.
Also starring Abbi Jacobson (last heard in "The Mitchells vs the Machines"), Michael Cera (last heard in "Cryptozoo"), Tavi Gevinson (last seen in "It's Me, Hilary: The Man Who Drew Eloise"), Bene Coopersmith, George Sample III, Philip Baker Hall (last seen in "The Amityville Horror" (2005)), Isiah Whitlock Jr. (last heard in "Lightyear"), Michaela Watkins (last seen in "The Way Back"), Olivia Luccardi (last seen in "Drunk Parents"), Ben Rosenfield (last seen in "A Most Violent Year"), Buddy Duress, Eleonore Hendricks, Marsha Stephanie Blake (last seen in "An American Pickle"), Okieriete Onaodowan (last seen in "A Quiet Place Part II"), Brian Tyree Henry (last seen in "Don't Let Go"), Marvin Gurewitz, Steve Urbanski, Craig Butta, Dakota O'Hara, David Zellner (last seen in "Ain't Them Bodies Saints"), Hunter Zinny, William Sydney, Eric Hynes, Maxwell Apple, Duke Stewart, Jim Fletcher, Jicky Schnee.
RATING: 4 out of 10 killer doughnuts
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