Scenes From a Marriage

Year 13, Day 15 - 1/15/21 - Movie #3,717

BEFORE: I'm now two films ahead of schedule, which is great - but I really need to be THREE films ahead if I'm going to finish the January films in January, and hit Valentine's Day the way I want.  So I've got to hold one more double-feature session next week to get back on track.  I can't do it today, this film is nearly three hours long!

Liv Ullmann and Erland Josephson both carry over again from "Cries and Whispers".  

THE PLOT: The many years of love and turmoil that bind Marianne and Johan through matrimony, infidelity, divorce and subsequent partners. 

AFTER: Of course, I knew Woody Allen films long before I watched any Bergman films, and Allen is known as a hardcore fan of Bergman's, he even borrowed plotlines for a few of his own films.  I already mentioned how "Wild Strawberries" influenced "Stardust Memories" (and also, later, "Deconstructing Harry", and many people have compared "Cries and Whispers" to Allen's "Interiors" and noted the similarities between "The Seventh Seal" and Allen's "Love and Death".  The connections between "Scenes From a Marriage" and the movie "Scenes From a Mall" (which starred Woody Allen, though he did not direct it) probably begin and end with the similar titles, however.  Common opinion, though, is that Allen's film "Husbands and Wives" is most closely based on Bergman's famous 1974 film (which started as a 1973 Swedish TV mini-series, which got edited down to a LONG movie for international release.)

If there's another modern movie that evokes the topic and tone of "Scenes from a Marriage", it might be 2019's "Marriage Story", though.  I'm now thinking that film with Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson might be very Bergman-esque, and now that I'm nearly done watching Bergman's key movies I get to call things "Bergman-esque" if I want to.  

This film starts out with married couple Marianne and Johan being interviewed on their 10th anniversary - for some documentary?  Ah, no, it's for a magazine article.  My bad.  I thought perhaps if a documentary was being made about marriage, it would explain why we the audience get to see so many intimate moments between these married partners.  Instead, this film follows the typical "omniscient camera" practice, where the camera is everywhere it needs to be, with no explanation - which we've all gotten used to, it's really only weird when you stop and think about it. But if this were shot like "The Office", with a never-seen documentary camera crew that's occasionally referenced, that would be weird, too, like why would this couple allow the camera crew into their bedroom during such intimate moments, and openly fight and argue in front of the camera.  Either way, knowing too much about the filmmaking process can make most films very hard to believe.  

I'm going to try not to think about this, and soldier on.  Marianne is a divorce lawyer, and Johan is some kind of scientist, it's something to do with optics but I sure didn't understand it.  After being interviewed for that magazine article, they have a dinner party with another couple, Peter and Katarina, who bicker constantly and keep threatening to divorce each other. (This is the "foil" couple, to make Marianne and Johan's marriage look better by comparison, but this effect only last for so long, because their marriage is in trouble a few years (?) later. 

In the second part (again, this was a 6-part miniseries, and it's not too difficult to see where the original breaks were) the couple debates why they're no longer finding joy in their sex life, and Johan shows some of his poetry to a co-worker, admitting that he's never shown it to his own wife.  By the third part, Johan has revealed that he's been having an affair with a younger woman named Paula, and intends to move out.  He's sold his boat and also taken out a loan so that he can provide child support for their two daughters, but it appears that his mind is set on packing up and leaving.  

This is the key turning point to me, it's that difficult conversation that nobody wants to have, yet sometimes it HAS to be had if either or both parties in a relationship are ever going to be able to move forward in their lives.  I had to have this conversation once, and ask my first wife to move out, as she had started some form of relationship with another woman, and then came out of the closet.  It sucks to be the one broken up with, it also sucks to be the one doing the breaking up.  There's nothing good about this conversation except for the promise it holds for the future, but in the present, it just sucks - the only thing worse is then going through the process of dividing up the furniture and possessions.  

Like Marianne and Johan, my first wife and I were friends with another couple that was very close to breaking up, about a year before we did.  The husband wanted to initiate the break-up, and he also wanted to keep the apartment, and that didn't seem right to us.  So we had a tacit agreement that if one of us wanted to split, the other would get to stay in the condo.  I kind of lucked into owning a piece of property that way, as a sort of consolation prize, but I did have to get her name removed from our mortgage and also pay her back half of our investment in the next two years.  It wasn't easy, but I was able to rent out a room and put my tenant's rent toward buying her out - if I hadn't done that I would have had to sell the property.

The remaining three chapters in the film show the couple coming back together at various times, once to discuss finalizing their divorce, a second time to actually sign the papers (this segment was quite difficult to watch, because they end up quarreling and physically fighting) and a final time when they are both married to other people, but they come together for a secret rendezvous at their vacation home, while their spouses are away on holiday.  This last part may seem very confusing to many married or divorced people - like, why go through all the trouble of getting divorced, then married to other people, just to sneak around and come back together again?  Ah, but theirs is an imperfect love, it seems - or maybe they can only be interested in having sex with each other when it's forbidden?  That would probably add some hint of danger to the proceedings, and maybe it's a semi-logical progression, since their sex life got so boring while they were married because it was no longer fun.  

NITPICK POINT: How come after the beginning scene, we never see the couple's two daughters again?  I know that Marianne was awarded custody, and I'm no expert on Swedish law, but wouldn't Johan at least have been granted visitations?  Or have to take them on alternate weekends?  Marianne always reminded him to send birthday cards to their daughters, but was he allowed to attend their birthday parties?  Just asking...

OK, now for the big question, because a lot of this is probably drawn from Bergman's real life - but he was married five times!  And that doesn't count his long-term relationships with actresses Bibi Andersson, Harriet Andersson, and Liv Ullmann.  So forgive me for asking, but how does this make him an expert on long-term relationships?  I guess he's either an expert on marriage or the absolute worst at it, depending on how you look at it.  Great at getting married, but terrible at staying married?  Something like that, right?  Either way, he clearly doesn't speak for all married people, and your mileage may vary, so you may not want to consider having a secret sexual relationship with your ex-spouse, it's probably not healthy in many ways.  A clean break is probably best, plus then you get to see each other at your parents funerals, and (eventually) at each other's.  Wait, that can't be right. 

This is still WAY too long, no matter how you look at it, even though it's been trimmed down from the six-hour miniseries version. Three hours is much too much relationship drama to sit through.  And what was the point of breaking up if they're only going to keep coming back together again?  Give me one solid reason why this story couldn't have them remarry, if they're going to still get together and be on the same page about so many things.  And surprisingly, they don't just get together to debate the existence of God, which is a relief. 

Also starring Bibi Andersson (last seen in "Persona"), Gunnel Lindblom (last seen in "Wild Strawberries"), Jan Malmsjö, Anita Wall, Barbro Hiort at Ornas, Rossana Mariano (also last seen in "Cries and Whispers"), Lena Bergman (ditto), Wenche Foss, Bertil Norström.

RATING: 5 out of 10 Sunday dinners with their parents