BEFORE: Follow-up visit to the doctor today, and even though my cholesterol is not high, it's the wrong kind. Too much of the bad LDL and not enough of the good HDL, so I've been given a list of foods to eat, and another list of foods to avoid. Guess which list has all of the things I like on it? Bacon, whole milk, avocados, coconuts, hot dogs, baked beans, doughnuts, potato chips and chocolate - aren't those all the things that make America great? It seems downright un-patriotic to avoid those foods, am I right? Jeez, just give me some Lipitor and let me keep eating the way I want. How am I supposed to avoid chocolate when it's right after Valentine's Day, and how am I supposed to avoid doughnuts when Dunkin Donuts is selling heart-shaped ones with cookie dough filling? This is so not fair.
Dermot Mulroney carries over from "The Wedding Date". I bet he gets to eat all the bacon and potato chips he wants...
THE PLOT: A forty-something preschool teacher looks to the personals for a change of pace and a relationship, with hilarious results.
AFTER: I'm doubly glad I re-organized the list before February began, because this theme of deception in romance has been running through the week, and looks to continue for another couple of days. Tonight it's the deception inherent in personal ads, where nobody lists their real age or their real measurements or mentions that they're mentally fragile. This is based on the concept that if everyone told the truth, no one would even get together and keep the species going.
Of course, this film came out before "catfishing" was a thing - there are plenty of examples of the problems inherent to internet dating and matchmaking web-sites, but they're mostly waved off for comic effect, leaving us with an acceptable set of circumstances under which our eventual couple meets, dates, meets again, calls things off, dates other people, meets again, and eventually gets together for real.
The flip-flopping here occurs, though, as a debate over whether it's better to lie or tell the whole truth. Initially lying is good, because a little exaggeration gets you noticed on a dating site, and increases your odds of finding "the one". But then lying is bad, because you want to know exactly who is sitting across from you as you eat dinner together, and what they're all about. When our eventual couple finally dates and are completely honest with each other about things, then it seems that things got a little too real too fast - so now being honest is bad? And then one is not honest about also dating another person, and when this is revealed, we're back to "lying is bad".
This doesn't make the film incoherent, just inconsistent. And if someone's going to do a whole take on dating in the internet age, it would have been nice if they would have worked out a point of view about it beforehand, and removed any ambivalence about it. Is it the best way for people to connect with a lot of people in a short period of time, making the process convenient, or is it the last refuge for desparate, lonely people who misrepresent themselves? Can it be both?
And is this process any better or worse than what the lead character's father does, which is to openly date three ladies at a time, essentially keeping his options open? The two processes seem to be compared here, but there's no weigh-in on which one works better. Maybe there's no rhyme nor reason to the process, what works for one person may not work for another. So why do everyone's friends and family get involved in the process, instead of letting people work it out on their own?
NITPICK POINT: Just because a man shops for groceries with a list, it does not mean that he's married. That seems like an antiquated notion. I am married and I shop with a list, but that's only because if I don't, I WILL forget one of the items I need to get. And that will happen any time the number of items goes over three.
Also starring Diane Lane (last seen in "Hard Ball"), John Cusack (last seen in "Cradle Will Rock"), Elizabeth Perkins (last seen in "Hop"), Christopher Plummer (last seen in "Alexander"), Stockard Channing (last seen in "Anything Else"), Ben Shenkman (last seen in "Blue Valentine"), Glenn Howerton (last seen in "Everything Must Go"), Ali Hillis, Brad William Henke, with cameos from Brad Hall, Steve Schirripa, Laura Kightlinger.
RATING: 5 out of 10 chicken breasts
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