BEFORE: I'm just back from San Diego Comic-Con, but I watched this film two days previous, on Sunday night - it was my reward to myself for surviving another trip there, possibly my tenth. It's tough to say when I started going, the conventions seem to all run together after a few years. I won't relate the entire adventure here, mainly because most of it involved sitting in a chair at a booth for long stretches of time, and partly because I tend to visit the same restaurants and buy some of the same things, and repeat many of the actions I did in years previous.
And that what it's become for me, largely a set of repeated actions, though each year I see some new faces and costumes, hear some news about different upcoming projects, sell slightly different merchandise. But I decided for once I'd go off the beaten path a bit. Well, originally I'd planned to see this film as part of the Comic-Con film programming, as I was sure they'd include it. Nope, though they were screening the FIRST Iron Man film, that did me little good. And since it's mostly gone from theaters in NYC, my next best shot was to see if it was playing in the San Diego area, at some time when I wouldn't be at the booth, or eating dinner, or sleeping. I had one shot, late Sunday night there was a 10:15 pm show in a town called Chula Vista.
I'm sure it's a lovely place, nestled halfway between San Diego and Tijuana, but I went there after dark, and perhaps it wasn't the best of plans, but I figured I was armed with my iPhone, with maps and internet and I'd be fine. So, after 8 hours working the con, breaking down the booth and schlepping unsold merchandise back to my hotel, I still had 4 hours to learn how to get to Chula Vista. Plenty of time - so much time that I stopped for a full BBQ dinner and two beers on the way. At this point, the sensible thing would have been to go back to the hotel and rest up for my flight back, but I persisted. Chula Vista or bust.
I thought about taking a cab there, but my phone said it was 15 minutes away, and I figured that with a fare of about $20 each way, this could end up being the most expensive movie I'd ever seen. So I gave the civic trolley system a try, with an all-day pass costing just $5 I figured I'd cut costs, and with a trolley map on my phone, I'd be able to figure out where to get off. No problem, I still had 2 hours until showtime. After about 30 minutes on the trolley I realized I was about 10 miles from downtown, and when I got off the trolley, I was still 5 long blocks from the movie theater. Still plenty of time, until I got to the place where the theater was supposed to be, and couldn't find it. But there was a mall, so I went by the mall, asked someone for directions, found the mall directory (no help), asked someone else for directions, and basically walked the long way around this huge mall, finally finding the theater in the back, up on the second floor. Made it with about 15 minutes to spare, but I was completely exhausted from walking (having also walked a fair amount around the convention center in the 4 days prior).
At this point, I wondered if I'd be able to stay awake for the film. Some Mountain Dew helped, but when it was over I still had that big walk back to the trolley, and honestly I wasn't even sure if it would still be running after 12:30 am. Got there at 1 am, to find that the last trolley into town was due in just 15 minutes. Back to my hotel by 2 am, and finally to bed.
The next day, Monday morning, nothing seemed to go right. I had trouble with the UPS store, trouble packing, trouble checking out of the hotel, missed the bus to the airport, broke a wheel on my luggage, split my pants, and so on. All these delays meant I was in a cab at 10:45 am for an 11:30 flight. The taxi went a few blocks and then got held up by two trains and two trolleys crossing - it was if the universe did not want me to make my flight, and I didn't. So I had to pay a change fee and got back to NY on Tuesday am instead of Monday pm. I think back to what I could have done differently, and all I've got is the trip to Chula Vista, meaning that this still ended up being the most expensive movie I've ever seen.
Linking from "Kick-Ass", Nicolas Cage was also in "The Family Man" with Don Cheadle (last seen in "Mission to Mars").
THE PLOT: When Tony Stark's world is torn apart by a formidable terrorist called the Mandarin, he starts an odyssey of rebuilding and retribution.
FOLLOW-UP TO: "Iron Man 2" (Movie #1,091) & "The Avengers" (Movie #1,144)
AFTER: If I'm tough on comic-book movies, it's because I love them so. Many of them have to walk a fine line when depicting someone with superpowers (or even without, in the case of "Kick-Ass"). If the main character is TOO powerful then we mere humans can't identify with them, but if they're too weak, then we can't idolize them. Marvel's track record with this is pretty good - think of how Spider-Man was both a cool superhero and a nerdy science geek at the same time. Hulk is the strongest one there is, but he turns into puny Bruce Banner.
In the case of Iron Man/Tony Stark, you've got an (allegedly) invulnerable suit and a very vulnerable man. Here he is seen after the events depicted in "Avengers", and he's an insomniac, constantly tinkering with different armors all hours of the day, dealing with his problems by not dealing with them. He's far from healthy, prone to anxiety attacks, and though he's doing a lot of work, the implication is that much of it may not be good work.
Some of the best Iron Man comics played upon a different vulnerability of Tony Stark - alcoholism. That's when James Rhodes first wore the Iron Man armor (Secret Wars/West Coast Avengers era) while Tony was deep in his addiction, having lost his company and driven away his friends. He got himself clean eventually, but the character still deals with his addiction, and that's powerful stuff for a comic book.
In the films, Stark is shown drinking wine, and I kind of wish they would address this, seeing as he already has the type of personality that drives people away, or keeps them at a distance. But without the addiction coming into play, he's just a rich asshole. He's trying to change, but an asshole who apologizes is still an asshole - and instead of being the guy who knows the right thing to say, he should be the guy who MEANS it.
Instead, Stark challenges the Mandarin quite publicly, and it leads to the loss of his house, loss of friends, loss of his job, and he has to rebuild, literally and figuratively. It's the same process an alcoholic might go through, but without having to get clean. Plus, isn't he also addicted to building robot suits, in a sense? They sort of imply that he's going to get himself well, but don't we hear this all the time from armor...I mean, drug and alcohol addicts?
I realize this is a different Iron Man story than the comic book ones, but the film should still honor where it came from. Why not adapt the "Armor Wars" storyline from the 80's? The one where Tony realizes his tech was stolen by Spymaster and used to make armors for Titanium Man, Crimson Dynamo, Beetle, Stilt-Man, etc. and he has to battle them all to get it back - plenty of chance in that storyline for redemption. Or hey, combine the alcoholism storyline with Armor Wars - you get personal growth, character development, revenge AND redemption. But what do I know? I'm not a studio executive.
Another key difference between the comic books and the film is the nature of the Mandarin character. The Mandarin is one of Iron Man's greatest villains in the comic, and he's really old-school Chinese, with the robes and thrones and palaces and all that. Plus he's got 10 rings from a UFO that give him TEN different superpowers - how cool is that? But the film dispenses with the rings, and all the Confucius-type stuff, probably because they don't want to offend the huge Chinese market, and spoil the overseas box office.
So instead the Mandarin is more of a Bin Laden-style terrorist, so his name makes NO sense. He does have an army of followers willing to blow themselves up to make a point, so I see the tie-in to recent events, but the Mandarin himself has sort of a Kentucky accent, then a Liverpudlian one. So he's part Billy Bob Thorton, part Ringo Starr (?) and the screenplay bends over backwards to accommodate that. (I think I'm not quite giving the plot away here, there's more to discover) His army is revealed to be U.S. soldiers who have lost limbs, and therefore mad at the guvmint, but honestly I think this does a huge disservice to our veterans, just to satisfy China. What a mistake.
I saw Delta's new airplane safety video, and when they got to the part about sitting in an exit row, and if you don't want the responsibility of helping others out of the plane, you should notify the crew you want to switch seats. They had two white men (played by the same actor) who were willing to sit there, and a black man who definitely wasn't - so he switched seats with another clone of the helpful white man. You have to be careful with this sort of thing - the implication was that all white men are willing to help in an emergency, and all black men are not. I foresee some phone calls from the NAACP.
Other nitpicks: in the comic books, there is NO connection between Mandarin and A.I.M. None. A.I.M. has been led by Graviton, Mentallo, Super-Adaptoid, M.O.D.O.K. and others, but never the Mandarin. I say, if you're not going to do the Mandarin story right, then don't do it. Pick another Iron Man villain.
The comics also did a storyline with Extremis, which was more of a virus that allowed people to heal themselves, not blow themselves up. It also allowed Tony Stark to integrate his armor into his body somehow - which means it's been used as sort of a "magic bullet" DNA re-sequencing thing, it does whatever the writers need it to do. It's like what "hacking" was in 90's computer movies. Hmm, looking back on the storyline, it seems that Mandarin did try to release Extremis to reshape the human race, at least those that had a certain genetic sequence, but of course this movie didn't go that way either, and went in a completely different direction.
NITPICK POINT: And then, given all of Extremis' negative effects, for Stark to say, "Oh, well, I'll just fix Extremis." Like it's THAT easy. His expertise is with electronics, not viruses and DNA. Would you say, "Oh, well, I'll just cure cancer"? Why can't they make medications that work without negative side effects? Because it's difficult.
Now the positives: this was still a very thrilling action movie, and the final battle was particularly stunning, though it did sort of repeat the same tricks over and over.
Maybe you heard the news out of Comic-Con - Downey's in for two more "Avengers" movies, and "Age of Ultron" is the subtitle for next one, but the storyline will probably not resemble the recent comic-book crossover of the same name. I'm optimistic, but it also looks like another case of adapting a comic-book story while messing with it at the same time.
Also starring Robert Downey Jr., (last seen in "Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows") Gwyneth Paltow (last seen in "Contagion"), Guy Pearce (last seen in "Prometheus"), Rebecca Hall, Jon Favreau (last heard in "John Carter"), Ben Kingsley (last seen in "Oliver Twist"), James Badge Dale, William Sadler (last seen in "Freaked"), Miguel Ferrer (last seen in "The Manchurian Candidate"), the voice of Paul Bettany (last seen in "Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World"), with cameos from Mark Ruffalo (last seen in "Collateral"), Bill Maher, Joan Rivers, Stan Lee.
RATING: 8 out of 10 security badges
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