BEFORE: Amber Heard carries over from "3 Days to Kill" and Jason Momoa is going to get me super close to my Easter movie. I realized too late that I had scheduled this film for Thursday, one day before Good Friday, and it maybe would be more fitting there, because that's the day that all the good Catholics eat fish, right?
I really need to spend Easter Sunday working on my April and May movie schedule, because it's hard to know for sure what to schedule if I don't know what path is going to take me to a good Mother's Day movie. I was planning on watching "Oppenheimer" right after my April 1 movie, but then I saw that Robert Downey Jr.'s birthday is April 4, so maybe I need to delay it by a couple days, and that works great with my plan because I'll be working all day April 2.
But then if I delay "Oppenheimer" a couple of days, I might as well see if I could stick a few films in-between, plus then there's "Barbie" to consider - not that I have any interest in putting the two films together and watching "Barbenheimer" which was the fad last year allegedly. But those are two films with enormous casts, there are some giant linking opportunities I might be missing out on, and I could link just about ANYWHERE from either film, and that should make things a lot easier, but it doesn't, it makes it harder to decide from all of the possible options. (And no, the two films do not share any actors, but I know of at least one film that shares actors with both of them, and could serve as a link...but do I want to DO that?)
But then I got to thinking, Oppenheimer's birthday is April 22, so now I don't know what to do, maybe find some more films to cram into the chain and delay that Oscar-winning film even further? I've just got to block out the path to Mother's Day and figure out what will work best.
FOLLOW-UP TO: "Aquaman" (Movie #3,174)
THE PLOT: Black Manta seeks revenge on Aquaman for his father's death. Wieldning the Black Trident's power, he becomes a formidable foe. To defend Atlantis, Aquaman forges an alliance with his imprisoned brother to protect the kingdom.
AFTER: Well, that first "Aquaman" movie made over a billion dollars, so naturally the studio, Warner/DC/Time/AOL/Discovery/Max/Taco Bell hoped to capitalize on its success by making a sequel, and then of course not veering very far from the storyline of that first film - give the people what they appear to want, right? And that's how we all get "Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom", which takes all the same characters and elements from that first film and just mixes them up a little - instead of fighting with his half-brother, Ocean Master, Aquaman frees him from prison and they fight on the same side. Mera, who went all over the world with Aquaman in the last film looking for the macguffin, the Trident of Atlan, is absent for much of this movie because her character gets injured, but really there was some controversy during her recent trial where it was revealed that studio brass didn't think she had good chemistry with Jason Momoa, or something. So that's why they stepped up with the Ocean Master character, this time he's the one who travels through the desert with Aquaman, and then helps him find Black Manta.
But really, come on, isn't this the same story, just more of it? I mean, I'm there for it, but aren't they closing down the DC Extended Universe next year, just to reboot it? Or was "The Flash" meant to be the closing film, and that film's release date got switched with this one's? Who releases a superhero film near Christmas, anyway? Well, I guess there are a few scenes set in the Antarctic and in a frozen underwater kingdom, it's not exactly Christmas-ey but it sure does look awful cold.
I'll give them points for amping up the environmental messaging, I mean it makes sense for the King of Atlantis to speak about ecological concerns, considering how much plastic and garbage we humans keep dumping in the ocean. And the Earth is like 75% ocean, right? You'd think we'd take better care of it, but we don't. So there's a very strong climate change message here, as Black Manta keeps stealing something called orichalcum from Atlantis, and burning it - not for the energy it produces, but he's actually TRYING to bring about climate change faster. Well, yeah, he's got to be stopped for sure! The world's not supposed to be a total fiery hellpit for at least another 75 years, and he's trying to cut that down to FIVE!
It turns out that Black Manta has been given the Black Trident, which he carries around in two pieces and has to quickly assemble it whenever he wants to fight with it, which seems very unnecessary and inconvenient. But it also means he's been possessed by Kordax, the brother of King Atlan, who was seen in the flashbacks of the previous film. Kordax used black magic turn the mermen and merladies of his kingdom, Necrus, into zombie mermaids, and it's a little unclear why he did that, but Wiki says he was trying to usurp the throne of Atlantis. Ah, so the Black Trident was used to power an insurrection, so just think of January 6, only everyone storming the capital is a zombie mermaid. As punishment, Trump - wait, I mean Kordax - was frozen in place for hundreds of years, underneath Antarctica, and I guess he's still alive, or at least undead, and he's angry. I guess with the icecaps melting he figured he could eventually be back on top, and thus the plan to accelerate global warming?
But he needs the blood of King Atlan to break the curse and end his imprisonment, and King Atlan is very dead, but his descendants are still around, and that means Aquaman's mother, Atlanna, is a potential source for his blood, and so is Aquaman, Ocean Master and also Aquaman's baby son, Arthur Jr. No - he wouldn't, would he? Yah, he would!
Well, look, at least something exciting is happening, because it seems like Arthur Curry was pretty bored being King of Atlantis, it turns out the job isn't as exciting as he was promised, there's a lot of ceremonial stuff, briefings and meetings and also there's a ruling council that shoots down just about any legislation the King proposes. Congratulations, that's called government, it's the same all around, sorry the job isn't COOL enough for you, Aquaman. This probably explains why he leaves to go fight bad guys with the Justice League at every possible opportunity. Things don't get any better when Atlantis joins the United Nations, I'm sorry to say. But maybe a giant brine shrimp can address the U.N. Security Council, and that's pretty cool.
They also added a new character, Kingfish, who rules the Sunken Citadel, which is an underwater pirate hang-out, but really, it's impossible to see this character as anything but a Jabba the Hutt rip-off, only he's a fish. Damn, but there are still like six or seven more underwater kingdoms to explore, only there just won't be enough time to get to them all, not with the DC Universe closing down for rebooting. Aw, that's such a shame...
Also starring Jason Momoa (last seen in "The Flash"), Patrick Wilson (last seen in "Moonfall"), Yahya Abdul-Mateen II (last seen in "The Matrix Resurrections"), Nicole Kidman (last seen in "Val"), Randall Park (last seen in "The People We Hate at the Wedding"), Temuera Morrison (also last seen in "The Flash"), Dolph Lundgren (last heard in "Minions: The Rise of Gru"), Jani Zhao, Pilou Asbaek (last seen in "Overlord"), Indya Moore (last seen in "Escape Room: Tournament of Champions"), Vincent Regan (last seen in "Snow White and the Huntsman"), Natalia Safran (last seen in "Over Her Dead Body"), the voices of Martin Short (last seen in "Windfall") and John Rhys-Davies (last heard in "Sinbad: Beyond the Veil of Mists") and archive footage of Michael Beach (last seen in "Waiting to Exhale")
RATING: 6 out of 10 cans of Guinness (I'll allow it...)
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