BEFORE: OK, I realize this is a bit off-topic, but please bear with me. The problem with watching so many films about rock stars in a row is what I've expressed - so many of them have burned out and died young, or at least the ones that people have made documentaries about. I've covered every member of the "27 Club" and then some, and it's very troubling, depressing. It's starting to affect me, knowing that all these people who were talented and famous couldn't keep their hands off the booze or the needles out of their arm. Sure, there's been some balance achieved by watching films about walking dinosaurs like Keith Richards and Mick Jagger, but it's not enough. I've peeked ahead at the schedule and there's more dead pop stars stacked up like firewood, just waiting for me.
So, what to do? How do I keep my spirits up while mired in death and destruction, which seem to go hand in hand with the rock and roll lifestyle? I look for an antidote - actually two antidotes, comedy and people with longevity. After Tony Bennett turned up in the last two documentaries on Amy Winehouse and Lady Gaga (and realizing he's in the next film also) I remembered that he also appeared in this documentary about people who are active in their 90's. This just HAS to be the opposite of the "27 Club", it's the "90 Plus Club" - so I had this one down at the bottom of my list, with docs about Joan Rivers and Robin Williams (umm, yeah, more death and depression there...) so I'm moving this one up on the list in the hopes it's a very positive film, and thus I can achieve some balance.
Tony Bennett opens this film with his rendition of "The Best Is Yet to Come", so I think I'm making a smart move here. It's helpful to know that I've got three extra slots before the end of the year, so I can drop this one in and now I only have to add two more horror films in October, and perhaps I'll finish 2018 right on schedule. This one doesn't have to officially count as part of the Rockumentary chain, it's just a little break from it. I'll get back to dead music stars tomorrow.
AFTER: They say in life you have to take the bad with the good - well, there's been much too much bad around here lately, so I needed something life-affirming, and this is going to have to do. This is a portrait of some famous actors who are over the age of 90, but also some regular people who have also lived that long - a war veteran, a painter, a notable fashion designer and a few musicians (a pianist and also a harmonica player). Society has told us that we need to retire at age 65, and that by the time we reach 70, we should be in a home somewhere, staring at the walls and complaining about the nursing home staff who we're SURE are stealing our loose change. Well, screw that, because these geezers are dancing, doing gymnastics, performing at cafés overlooking Central Park, and they're keeping busy, despite the fact that they're essentially in EXTRA INNINGS time.
Surely there must be some collective wisdom to be mined from their experiences, right? Tips on how to grow old gracefully, hell, I'd settle for tips on how to grow old at all, graceful or not. Diet, exercise, daily aspirin - what's the magic formula? Well, I guess that depends on who you ask, because there's no clear consensus on how these people GOT to be in their 90's, which makes the cynical part of me wonder if they were just lucky. Sure, somebody's bound to make it to their 90's, I guess it happens to be THESE people. But then again, the woman who started running when she was in her 50's seems to be a clear indicator that daily exercise should probably be part of everyone's plan. Yeah, I'll get right on that when I finish all of my movies. Seriously, though, I'm turning FIFTY later this year, and this does give me some hope. If 90 is like the new 70, then maybe 50's the new 35 or something.
I've heard of ladies who live to be 105 or 106, and the news sometimes reports that their secret is a shot of whiskey every day, so there's hope beyond all the yogurt and granola, I think. Of course, if I celebrate my birthday each year with a big plate of barbecued meat, I'm probably not doing myself any favors. But who wants to live longer if you're not enjoying what you eat? For that matter, who wants to live to be 90 if you have to waste so much time exercising in order to get there? Nobody's dying words are ever "I should have exercised more..." so I tend to think the opposite holds true - you might live longer if you run five miles a day, but when you do the math, how much of your extra time was then wasted on running, instead of enjoying your life?
The title, of course, comes from the old joke about an elderly man's daily routine - "I get up, read the paper, check the obituaries, and if I don't see my name listed, I go back to bed." I guess changing it to "eat breakfast" demonstrates a more positive attitude towards getting on with one's day. But Reiner's got a great follow-up story in what happened one day when he checked the obits and he DID see his name there, or at least his picture. Unfortunately, Reiner tips the joke by putting the follow-up story first, so that later in the film, when he tells the joke to an audience (at a special screening of his film "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid") then the joke doesn't land with the home audience. I've got to call a NITPICK POINT here, they should have opened the film with Reiner talking to the audience and telling that joke in response to an audience member's question, then showed the follow-up story where he sees his own picture in the obituary column, then followed that with the opening credits.
And this celebration of longevity is marred a little bit by the realization that since this film was made, two of its subjects have passed away - Fyvush Finkel in 2016 and Patricia Morison in 2018 - Morison was in the last Sherlock Holmes film with Basil Rathbone in it, released in 1946! The film also checks in with Kirk Douglas, who had a stroke 20 years ago but has not let that slow him down, he even performed a one-man show about his life, despite having difficulty talking. Plus there are shout-outs to George Burns, Estelle Reiner and Jerry Seinfeld's mother, who are also no longer with us.
I wish that there could have been more in-depth analysis here about HOW these people managed to live so long, because if you just go by their interviews, you might draw the conclusion that they've stayed alive just by keeping busy, or by having a hobby or activity that gives them a reason to get up each morning. How many of them have not smoked, drank heavily or not taken drugs? Because after realizing how many drug users don't make it past 27, I'd prefer to make a comparison. As it is, from all the Jewish nonagenarian comedians seen here, one might draw the conclusion that the secret to long life is eating kosher. Eh, I'd give it a try, I love going to delis except I can't live without the Swiss cheese on my reuben sandwiches.
Maybe there's no special formula, except to have a positive attitude, keep busy and don't over-indulge on anything, except maybe dancing. That seems to have worked for Dick Van Dyke, who's as limber now as ever, and in 2012 married a woman half his age. (See, there's a reason to get up in the morning...)
So mission accomplished, I feel a little better now and I've achieved some kind of balance. For every Jim Morrison, it's good to know that there's a Carl Reiner out there. For every Janis Joplin, there's a Betty White. For every Brian Jones there's a Stan Lee or a Norman Lear, and for every Jimi Hendrix there's a Dick van Dyke. There's your new anti-drug campaign right there, you're welcome.
Also starring Carl Reiner (last seen in "Slums of Beverly Hills"), Mel Brooks (last heard in "Mr. Peabody & Sherman"), Kirk Douglas (last seen in "Lust for Life"), Fyvush Finkel (last seen in "The Crew"), Norman Lear, Stan Lee (last seen in "Avengers: Infinity War"), Dick Van Dyke (last seen in "Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb"), Betty White (last seen in "The Story of Us"), Patricia Morison (last seen in "Dressed to Kill"), Dave Grusin, Jerry Seinfeld, Iris Apfel, Alan Bergman, Dan Buettner, Irving Fields, Stan Harper, Ida Keeling, Shelley Keeling, Eric Marienthal, Jim "Pee Wee" Martin", Raymond Olivere, Colton Pence, Tao Porchon, George Shapiro, Harriet Thompson, Arlene Van Dyke, Terry Wollman, with archive footage of or cameos from Conan O'Brien (last seen in "Sandy Wexler"), Jimmy Fallon (last seen in "Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping"), Tom Scott, Nathan East, Queen Latifah (last heard in "Ice Age: Collision Course"), Mary Tyler Moore, Jane Leeves, Valerie Bertinelli, Wendie Malick, Estelle Reiner and Yul Brynner.
RATING: 6 out of 10 talk-show appearances
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