The Legend of Bagger Vance

Year 5, Day 219 - 8/7/13 - Movie #1,502

BEFORE:  Moving on to golf - from an Irish boxer to an originally Scottish sport.  Probably one of the only sports I know less about than boxing would be golf.  I've watched a fair amount, or I should say I've recorded and fast-forwarded through a lot for work (lots of high-end financial companies sponsor tournaments, and I need to research their commercials) but watching the sport itself?  No thanks, it looks way too boring.

Linking from "The Boxer", Brian Cox was also in "The Bourne Supremacy" with Matt Damon (last seen in "We Bought a Zoo").

THE PLOT:  A down-and-out golfer attempts to recover his game and his life with help from a mystical caddy.

AFTER:  I followed the actor linking, and once again it turned out well - both "The Boxer" and this film both feature characters who were in a war/conflict, and seek some form of refuge or redemption in sport.  Tonight's central character, Rannulph Junuh, was in World War I, and was the only returning veteran from a platoon of soldiers, and clearly has some form of survivor guilt.  They never really detail the circumstances, whether he was responsible for the loss of the platoon or just the (un)lucky remnant, but that's OK, we can take the horror of war as a given and move on.

When Junuh returns to the U.S., he spends a few years wandering around before returning to Savannah, Georgia, and he does not contact his girlfriend during that time.  So she moves on, and becomes a golf-course entrepreneur, quite coincidentally.  But our hero has lost his innocence, his relationship, and his golf swing.  Still, there's really no excuse for not at least writing to your girlfriend for 10 years.

Again, quite coincidentally, this passage of time allows the film to also touch on the Great Depression, so this gives a reason for the golf course to be in financial trouble, which allows for the attempt to create an exhibition tournament - and you can see the plot points leading into one another like toppling dominoes.

Much has been written about the "magical black man" character, the caddy who arrives out of nowhere with the exact knowledge to fix the main character's golf swing, attitude, relationship and life, in that order.  I'm not necessarily as opposed to the character on a racial basis as some people seem to be, but again it's a case of asking me to continually believe coincidences that get more far-fetched as the film progresses.  Late in the tournament a situation comes up that just happens to teach Junuh the EXACT lesson of humility that he needs to learn to be a better golfer, and therefore a better person.

Look, I've got nothing against golf, if that's how you choose to spend your time.  It's when people start saying that all of life's little lessons can be learned on the golf course that I start sensing B.S. Admittedly, most of the golf I've played has been of the miniature variety, but I never got the feeling that I was learning anything, facing my demons or getting in touch with my inner self by whacking a ball around a putting green.

Besides, they never say whether the caddy is an angel, a magician, or just a golf expert, and I really think you need to pick one at some point.  If you read between the lines, supposedly "Bagger Vance" and "R. Junuh" are supposed to be verbal corruptions of "Bhagavan" (aka Krishna) and "Arjuna" from the Hindu text "The Bhagavad Gita", and the golf lessons are symbolic of Krishna's advice to a warrior who refuses to fight, to get him back on the heroic path.  Again, I can't speak to this, but I did feel it was worth pointing out.

Also starring Will Smith (last seen in "Men in Black 3"), Charlize Theron (last seen in "Prometheus"), Bruce McGill (last seen in "Collateral"), Joel Gretsch (last seen in "Push"), Jack Lemmon (last seen in "The Fortune Cookie"), Lane Smith, Peter Gerety, J. Michael Moncrief, Harve Presnell.

RATING: 6 out of 10 sand traps

The Boxer

Year 5, Day 218 - 8/6/13 - Movie #1,501

BEFORE:  Last boxing film, then I'm moving on to other sports.  Linking from "The Fighter", Christian Bale was also in a film called "Equilibrium" with Emily Watson (last seen in "The Proposition").

THE PLOT:  Danny Flynn is imprisoned for his involvement with the IRA in Belfast. He leaves behind his family and his fourteen year old girlfriend, Maggie Hamill. Fourteen years later, Danny is released from prison and returns to his old working class neighborhood to resume his life as a boxer, and open a boxing club training aspiring young boxers.

AFTER: This is half a boxing film, half a film about the IRA.  Which means it's sure to be depressing, as everything about the IRA usually is.  I agree war is terrible, but I remember when the troubles were going on in Northern Ireland, and it just seemed like such a non-winning situation for both parties, and it took so long for them to agree on a cease-fire that I think most people couldn't remember why they started fighting in the first place.

Not that I have any personal experience with war - being a casualty in the dispute between CBS and Time Warner Cable is probably as close as I've come.  Just remember there are no winners in war.

The main character here is anti-war, but pro boxing, which is almost a contradiction - if they're all going to stop shooting each other and start punching each other, I guess that's an improvement?  Well, the boxing club is for Catholics and Protestants, so it can be seen as a step forward.  Which is exactly why some people naturally wanted to shut it down.  Or burn it down, whichever.

Overall I found this one pretty hard to follow, since there were just too many parties with different agendas.  And some were hypocritical, like berating the wives of imprisoned Irishmen for dating other men - which in the end didn't seem all that supportive.

Who knew that they held British boxing matches in ballrooms?  That was mildly interesting...

Also starring Daniel Day-Lewis (last seen in "The Bounty"), Brian Cox (last seen in "The Zodiac"), Ken Stott (last seen in "One Day"), Gerard McSorley, Ian McElhinney.

RATING: 4 out of 10 checkpoints

The Fighter

Year 5, Day 217 - 8/5/13 - Movie #1,500

BEFORE:  Another look behind the scenes today, as I hit a big, round number of films.  I try to schedule a big or important film for these milestones, in tonight's case it's a 7-time Oscar nominee and 2-time winner.  The trick then becomes, once I try to schedule a film for a specific date, locking down the chain of films until that date.  Any additions to the chain will push the film off that date - fortunately I had left enough room in the schedule to drop in "Man of Steel" and "The Wolverine" so I didn't have to delete something as well.  And putting three boxing films together gave me a little wiggle-room - if this film slipped off of the 1,500 mark I could have adjusted by putting it earlier or later in the boxing chain.

Now, with just 100 slots left in the year (and 148 days, seems quite do-able...) it's time to take a hard look at the topics I want to cover and figure out what can and can't be done before Dec. 31.  My initial plan was to make my way through Hitchcock's filmography, and then re-assess.  But that's 50 films right there, plus a 4-film intro and a 7-film outtro - leaving me just 39 open slots, and I've got way more films than that which are vying for some attention.  So it looks like I'm pushing the Hitchcock chain back AGAIN, to 2014 - next year's going to be all about Hitchcock, Woody Allen, let's say Chaplin, and the Marx Brothers, if I'm in the mood. 

This means I've torn apart my chain and re-assembled it (which I try to do no more than twice a year) to cover marketing/economics, pop/rock music, back-to-school films, 9/11 documentaries, presidents/politics, Halloween, Westerns/horses, war films, and holiday films.  (You can almost see what the "pivot" films will be, like "War Horse", and if I can program "Lincoln" next to "Abe Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" I'll be a happy camper.)  Problem is, I'm 14 movies short - but I'm sure I can find a topic to close the gap.  I'm adding to the list all the time, and I'd rather be 14 movies short than be 14 movies over and have to cut something.

Linking from "Rocky Balboa", famous ring announcer Michael Buffer (last seen in "Love & Other Drugs") carries over, which lets me know I'm on the right track.  Honestly, I'm surprised he hasn't appeared in more boxing films since he trademarked his signature intro.  In his honor, let's get rrrready to rrrrrreview some more movies! 

THE PLOT:  A look at the early years of boxer "Irish" Micky Ward and his brother who helped train him before going pro in the mid 1980s.
 
AFTER:  I've already determined that a boxing film would be quite boring if it were JUST about the boxing.  There's only so much fight footage the audience can take, and there's only so much technical information about body blows and left hooks that we can stand as well.  So there has to be drama taking place outside the ring, and this film has that in spades.

From a complicated family full of half-sisters to a domineering mother/manager to a half-brother/trainer with a budding drug addiction, it's hard to imagine a more dramatic background.  Throw in a budding romance with a bartender, and it's easy to see that this boxer's life is just way too complicated.  When he starts to get the feeling that his family might not have his best interests at heart, it's time for Micky to simplify his life, and consider new management and a new training regimen, before it's too late. 

What we learn is that there's more to being a boxer than just hitting somebody (though that's important too) - there's getting the right training, then there's getting the title shot, which involves a fair amount of luck, plus you have to not only win fights, you have to win them against the right opponents.

I liked the way that Micky's career was contrasted with Dicky's - one brother is coming up in his career at the same time the other is sliding down the other side.  But Dicky's still telling his stories, still living off the limited success that he did have, and still seen as an expert, even though his personal life is in shambles.  True, HBO is making a documentary about him, but not the one he thinks.  They're more interested in his illegal extra-curricular activities than his planned boxing comeback.

Micky has to make a difficult decision about whether to jettison his family and strike out on his own, or stick with the plan and possibly never gain the success that he may deserve.  I can see this as symbolic of the choices that many people have to make - how long should one stay working at a job which guarantees only limited success?  When should one chart a new path and switch jobs, even if doing so risks the entirety of one's career?  

Rocky had Philadelphia, and Micky Ward had Boston - or Lowell, to be more specific.  Having grown up outside of Boston and having spent a fair amount of time within the city limits, I think the portrayal of a tough Boston-area family was spot-on, right down to the accents.  And if you think the boxers are tough, you should meet their sisters.  I think my favorite part was when they started brawling with Micky's girlfriend over who was "classier".  Girls, you all lose that argument when you start to duke it out.   Reportedly the real Ward/Eklund sisters didn't like the way they were portrayed in this film, and started causing a scene during the premiere screening.  Which sort of proves the movie's point, if you ask me. 

Also starring Mark Wahlberg (last seen in "The Italian Job"), Christian Bale (last seen in "The Dark Knight Rises"), Amy Adams (last seen in "Man of Steel"), Melissa Leo (last seen in "Red State"), Jack McGee (last seen in "Drive Angry"), Mickey O'Keefe (as himself), with cameos from Sugar Ray Leonard and George Foreman.

RATING: 7 out of 10 sparring sessions 

Rocky Balboa

Year 5, Day 216 - 8/4/13 - Movie #1,499

BEFORE: It turned out to be a rather smooth transition, from superhero movies to sports films - perhaps that's because I'm starting with boxing, and comic-book fights and boxing matches obviously share a few things...

I waited a long time for some premium channel to run this one, after watching Rocky III through V in a previous boxing chain - but none did.  So I'm forced to watch a version with commercials that ran on FX, I can't imagine they chopped it up too bad, except for adding the breaks. Linking from "Here Comes the Boom", Henry Winker was also in "The Lords of Flatbush" with Sylvester Stallone (last seen in "Daylight").

THE PLOT: Rocky Balboa comes out of retirement to step into the ring for the last time and face the heavyweight champ Mason 'The Line' Dixon.

FOLLOW-UP TO: "Rocky V" (Movie #517)

AFTER: This movie takes its sweet time, getting Rocky back into the ring - for a while it didn't even seem like the script had that destination in mind at all.  The first half of the film shows Rocky visiting his wife's grave, telling boxing stories at his restaurant, embarrassing his son, and spending time with a woman who he knew when she was a little girl.  Because that's not weird at all.

He's got plans to get back into boxing, possibly at the local level - why he doesn't spend time at a gym training other fighters, I have no idea.  But the guy's looking pretty old at this point, especially when you see how much his son aged since the last film.  His plan gets fast-tracked when ESPN runs a computer simulation to determine how Rocky, at his peak, would fare against the current heavyweight champion, and this sparks enough debate that the actual fight gets proposed.

It's considered an exhibition match, a glorified sparring contest, though I don't see how this works on a practical level for the boxers - "Punch the other guy, just not very hard?"  But considering the knockout record of his opponent, it does make sense that people would question whether power beats endurance, or the other way around.  Remember, Rocky always "wins" if he goes the distance.

So Rocky agrees to the fight - hey, it's not like he can get brain damage, because, seriously, how much brain is left at this point?  And how much did he even start with?  But a key element of every other "Rocky" movie is missing here - did someone forget about the importance of the training montage?

Also starring Burt Young (last seen in "Win Win"), Antonio Tarver, Geraldine Hughes (last seen in "Gran Torino"), Milo Ventimiglia (last seen in "Armored"), A.J. Benza, with cameos from Mike Tyson (last seen in "The Hangover Part II"), Frank Stallone and Michael Buffer (last seen in "Love & Other Drugs").

RATING: 4 out of 10 rounds (of course...)

Here Comes the Boom

Year 5, Day 215 - 8/3/13 - Movie #1,498

BEFORE: Linking from "Real Steel" was really tough tonight - I'd had something worked out, but an actress in a minor uncredited role shouldn't really count, so instead I had to dig deep and find that an actor named Miguel Sandoval played a judge (I assume a boxing judge) in "Real Steel", and he was also in the film "Fair Game" with Salma Hayek (last seen in 'Once Upon a Time in Mexico").

THE PLOT:  A high school biology teacher looks to become a successful mixed-martial arts fighter in an effort to raise money to prevent music classes from being axed at his cash-strapped school.

AFTER: There's something almost noble about this film, because it has good intentions - the main message is that music class is important to public schools, and that's a message I can get behind.  Unfortunately we're at a terrible crossroads in the economy, where programs are being slashed to balance budgets at the city and state level across the country (I assume? I admit, I'm kind of out of the loop when it comes to high-school kids.)

I participated in music programs in junior high and high-school, and my mother was an elementary school teacher for many years, so music was always part of my education.  I wasn't allowed to play sports, so chorus and orchestra were my only chances to participate in activities with others.  (OK, there was P.E. class, but I've repressed most of those memories...)  So I agree that these programs are essential for a large number of teens.

But how can the average person help to save the music programs?  Bake sales have fallen out of favor, because of childhood obesity and related diseases.  And you can only hold so many car washes.  This film suggests a new route to take - raising money by becoming a mixed martial-arts fighter.

Sure, it's not for everyone - but our hero used to wrestle in college, so he thinks he's prepared for the sport (he isn't).  But there is a twist on the usual sports underdog story - he doesn't set out to win, he plans to lose, because even the losing fighters in this sport earn money, and he figures he can raise enough money just by participating and getting the stuffing beat out of him.  It's the hardest way imaginable to raise $50,000 if you think about it.  Jeez, you could probably recycle all the soda bottles at the school or...no, wait, that would be 1 million bottles, forget that.  Martial arts it is.

As the teacher decides to pay it forward, he finds one of his ESL students (he moonlights) is also a former cage-fighter, so in exchange for fighting tips, he agrees to get him help to pass the U.S. citizenship exam.  The tutor is a girl from the music program, and to free her up he needs to do a favor for her father, which involves his cousin who's a chef, and...look, it gets complicated, with everyone helping out someone else, but everyone benefits in the end.

It just so happens that this favor chain forms one of those "closed systems" that the teacher talks about in biology class.  In that sense the favors all seem quite coincidental, so really the seams are showing from where the plot got stitched together from a list of character motivations, but again, somebody meant well.

It's also a little coincidental that his time in the Octagon turns out to be JUST the thing that energizes the school, lands him a date with the school nurse, AND gets him (and his students) excited about teaching again.  But if you don't think too much about that, and just take it as a story about a man with a dream who tries to follow through and help people, it's fairly enjoyable.

Think of "The Rookie" mixed with "Mr. Holland's Opus"...

Also starring Kevin James, Bas Rutten, Joe Rogan, Gary Valentine (all four last seen or heard in "Zookeeper"), Henry Winkler, Greg Germann (last seen in "Once Around").

RATING: 5 out of 10 mouth guards

Real Steel

Year 5, Day 214 - 8/2/13 - Movie #1,497

BEFORE: That's it for the superhero films, I've got one more sci-fi type film, and then it's on to another subject - well, actually this is sort of a boxing film too, so I'm using it to bridge the two topics, sci-fi and boxing.  Then I'll get to the rest of the Sports wrap-up, then we'll take a look at the 5-day forecast and your local weather.  Oh, and Hugh Jackman carries over from "The Wolverine", I think you'll agree that was a bit of divine providence.

THE PLOT:  Set in the near future, where robot boxing is a top sport, a struggling promoter feels he's found a champion in a discarded robot. During his hopeful rise to the top, he discovers he has an 11-year-old son who wants to know his father.

AFTER: This is really two stories, it's the father/son relationship, and the look at the future-sport of robot boxing.  (though they never say exactly what year this takes place, it's some time after robot boxing became a thing, then fell out of favor for a bit, then underwent a revival.  Sort of like soccer in the U.S.)  Really, this could have been about any sport, or it could have been a screenplay about a regular human boxing contender, and someone felt the need to add robots - which isn't necessarily a bad thing.  You could get two great tastes that taste great together, like peanut butter and chocolate, or you could get something worse, like Oreos dipped in salsa.

It's perhaps a heavy buy-in - you have to believe that the robots are so sophisticated that they can box in several different modes, like voice-command mode, shadow-boxing mode, and dance-remix mode.  Yet the robots are apparently so simple that a man and boy with limited technical ability can find one in a scrapyard, repair it and re-wire it so that it can hold its own against newer, better models.  Not quite a NITPICK POINT, but it's a little hard to reconcile those two things.

You can probably guess the formula for the movie if you've seen just about any boxing movie, particularly "Rocky V" or perhaps "The Champ".  Take a washed-up older boxer (robot), get him back in fighting shape, and through keen management, and a bit of luck in a key fight, he gets a shot at the title, or something close to it.  In that sense this film is very by-the-numbers.  But since it's got robots, everything old is (almost) new again.

ASIDE: Whatever happened to "Battlebots", anyway?  That was a great show on Comedy Central about a decade ago, and it looked like that might represent the future of sports/entertainment.  I think this film helped revive the genre, since there was a new show "Robot Combat League" that was on earlier this year, but I didn't watch it.  The whole genre kind of went the way of the segway, it just sort of petered out.

The emotional storyline here is somewhat predictable, too.  If you predicted that the father and son who don't really know each other very well will be forced to work together towards a common goal, and develop an understanding that will lay the groundwork for a deep, lasting, loving relationship, then you get a gold star.  Or you've, like, probably seen a movie before.

Also starring Dakota Goyo, Evangeline Lilly (last seen in "The Hurt Locker"), Hope Davis (last seen in "Charlie Bartlett"), James Rebhorn, Anthony Mackie (last seen in "The Adjustment Bureau"), Kevin Durand (last seen in "I Am Number Four"). 

RATING: 6 out of 10 uppercuts

The Wolverine

Year 5, Day 213 - 8/1/13 - Movie #1,496

BEFORE: Much has been written lately about the under-performance of some of this year's films, like "R.I.P.D." and "The Lone Ranger", two big-budget action-packed films that coincidentally also have ties to comic books.  But it's films like "Iron Man 3", "Man of Steel" and now "The Wolverine" that appear to be keeping Hollywood funded.  I am not at all surprised - isn't that what superheroes do, save the day?

This would have been a great way to close out July, but I'll be honest, I was out at a beer event last night, so when I got home I was in no shape to watch a film.  But that worked out for the best, because after waiting another day, I was able to sneak out right after work to see this one in the theater, and keep my chain going, since Robert De Niro from "Limitless" was also in "Hide and Seek" with Famke Janssen (last seen in "Goldeneye").

THE PLOT:  Summoned to Japan by an old acquaintance, Wolverine becomes embroiled in a conflict that forces him to confront his own demons.

FOLLOW-UP TO: "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" (Movie #537, "X-Men: First Class" (Movie #1,100)

AFTER: Just like with "Man of Steel" and "Dark Knight Rises", they managed to cherry-pick some of the better Wolverine stories from the past to cobble this one together.  Namely, Wolverine goes to Japan ("Wolverine" limited series, 1982), loses his healing powers (umm, tried several times in the comic books) and displays his alternate claws (seen after X-Men #25, 1993).

As a fan of the comics I have to wonder why this was set in the movie X-Men's present, as opposed to years ago, since Wolvie first met Mariko and Clan Yashida back in the early 1980's.  I would have set this film in the past, right after the events of "X-Men Origins: Wolverine", but this is instead set after "The Last Stand", so our hero can pine/obsess over the death of Jean Grey.  This makes him a broken, tortured soul, and ultimately sympathetic and fragile, which is a nice counterpoint to his indestructability.  (the one thing his power can't heal is...sniff...his heart!)

Of course, he has been to Japan before, as seen in the opening scene of this film.  So how come when he goes back in the present day, he doesn't seem to know any of their customs?  I supposed this is easily explained away, since he only remembers fragments of his past.  Marvel manages to sweep away lot of continuity errors by saying "Oh, someone messed with his brain" or "the adamantium experiments and berserker rages turned his mind to Swiss cheese".

The film put a new spin on the Silver Samurai character, one I haven't seen before, but the rest was pretty predictable.  You just know he's got to get his healing power back somehow, you just know he's going to find a way to triumph over the villains, and the pieces are going to go back into the box for next time.  It's like when James Bond turned Japanese or got married, you just knew it couldn't last.

NITPICK POINT: They did reveal in the comic book a few years back that Wolverine had bone claws, long before he had metal ones.  After Magneto removed the metal from his body one time, they resurfaced.  Which sort of makes sense, since he has some kind of extra muscles that push his metal claws out and also retract them - they were part of his body that did the same for his bony claws.  But the bone claws are differently shaped than the metal ones - so the metal didn't cover the bones - so where did the bone claws go?  Were they behind the metal ones?  Did they disappear when he had the metal claws, and do they return when he loses them?  Am I overthinking this?

I am adding extra points, however, for the last few minutes of the film - do NOT leave the theater until you have seen the final scene, which takes place after some of the credits.  This is the most exciting five minutes I've seen on screen this year, as it essentially serves as a teaser for the next X-Men film, "Days of Future Past".  This film will bridge the gap between the team seen in "First Class" (Prof. X, Magneto, Mystique, Beast, Banshee, Havok) and the team last seen in "Last Stand" (Prof. X, Rogue, Storm, Shadowcat, Iceman, Colossus, etc.).

The original "Days of Future Past" storyline depicted a terrible future in which mutants were hunted and killed by giant Sentinel robots, and the consciousness of Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) was sent back in time to inhabit her younger body, so she could tell the X-Men they needed to prevent a political assassination, to prevent that future from coming true.  It looks like in the film they'll be sending Wolverine's consciousness back to the past in order to do something similar.

Hmm, all the X-Men characters, past and present, in one film, plus giant killer robots AND time travel?  This movie isn't even finished shooting yet, but I want to buy a ticket!

Also starring Hugh Jackman (last seen in "Les Miserables"), Tao Okamoto, Rila Fukushima, Hiroyuki Sanada, Will Yun Lee, Svetlana Khodchenkova, Brian Tee.

RATING: 8 out of 10 ninjas